The confessions of Judith Tizard, ineffectual minister for the arts, culture and heritage, are here.

Ever wondered who those deranged anonymous nutters commenting every five minutes on Kiwiblog were and how they come up with such gibberish? Wonder no more. They’re using the amazing twat-o-tron, available here. Generate your own frothing-at-the-mouth rants. Warning: it’s addictive.

Tipster: Banditry.

Paul Smith, president of the NZ Society of Authors, writes:

May 22, 2008, Labour’s ninth Budget – and our first breakthrough in 14 years over the Authors Fund.
It came as a result of our lobbying the Prime Minister Helen Clark, the Minister of Arts and Culture. Historically only Prime Ministers have been able to cut through the welter of objections from pollies and bureaucrats about increasing the money in the Fund and more important, removing it from Creative New Zealand. And so it was this year. On Budget Day we got everything we asked for – and then some.
Just to recap, when we met the Prime Minister in the Beehive in February, we went armed with a three-point strategy: The first was to rename and relaunch the Fund as the Public Lending Right. It was a simple change but one which recognised the emphasis now placed by policy-makers on a range of rights. We also asked for a top up of $750,000 – and got $500,000. Most importantly we asked for the Fund to be removed from the contestable funding body of Creative New Zealand to a new independent body which would ensure author representation.
The Prime Minister listened and on Budget day all our requests – and then some – were met. These are the changes that matter:
• The new Public Lending Right Bill was introduced. That means legislation will be needed to remove it from CNZ to the new body. Select committee hearings will be held, allowing time for the necessary debate.
• The $500,000 for 2008-2009, brings the Fund total to $2 million. Creative New Zealand will administer the payments this year – and there should be a bigger than usual Christmas present for qualifying authors. In 2009, control is scheduled to pass to the new body.
This package is a huge step towards autonomy for the Fund. It also takes us into a new era in which we can once again claim representation and greater control of an intellectual property right which for the past 14 years has not been given the recognition it deserved. Ahead of us there’s more work to ensure the right outcome, but this response is both generous and forward-looking.

This might seem arcane for anyone who isn’t a writer, but it’s great news for New Zealand authors who have been buggered about for years over this. Like the PLR in Britain and the equivalent system in most civilised countries, the Authors Fund (set up in 1973 under the Kirk Labour government) compensates authors for the loss of royalties from people reading library copies rather than buying them. Yes, libraries are good, but professional writers like people buying their books even more. That’s how we pay the bills so we can continue to write more books.
The Fund has long been administered by Creative NZ, which never wanted it as it doesn’t fit its system of contestable grants, and where it was never ensured of survival. The long impasse has been due to the intransigent refusal of the associate Minister of the Arts, Judith Tizard, to even discuss the matter let alone do anything about it. So three cheers for Helen Clark, and four cheers for Paul Smith who brought about this breakthrough.

Anne Applebaum’s review of Nicholson Baker’s Human Smoke: The Beginnings of World War II, the End of Civilisation in The New Republic is withering. Her conclusion:

. . . if we have arrived at the point where a solemn and excited individual can cobble together anecdotes from old newspapers and Nazi diaries, and write them up in the completely contextless manner of blog posts, and suggest that he has composed a serious critique of America’s decision to enter World War II, and then receive praise from respected reviewers in distinguished publications, then maybe it is time to say: Stop.

Tipster: Dim-Post.

A message for us all from Grahame Sydney:

Monday 19 May was the first day of the David and Goliath battle between energy giant Meridian Energy and landscape protection groups such as the Maniototo Environment Society and Central Otago Environmental Society. These groups are supported by an umbrella organisation, Save Central.

Save Central believes in the value of New Zealand’s landscapes. It wants to protect the beauty and naturalness of our country for future generations of New Zealanders. The aims of power-generating companies will destroy that hope with gigantic and inappropriate commercial developments such as Meridian’s Project Hayes Wind Farm in the heart of Central Otago.

Save Central believes New Zealand’s special landscapes should be protected from industrialisation. Many of us have dedicated months of our personal time and income to oppose the devastation of New Zealand’s outstanding landscapes for questionable, short-term gain. The legal and professional fees to oppose Project Hayes in the Environment Court amount to more than $200,000 and more money will be required to engage the public in a nationwide debate regarding our energy future.

We call upon you to help Save Central in two ways:
1. By making a financial contribution to Save Central. The old dictum applies: every dollar counts. If 10,000 people contribute $25, we have $250,000. Some will be able to donate more - perhaps $100 or $1,000. Please, please donate at least $25. Your contribution will go directly to the Save Central fighting fund and be acknowledged with a tax-deductible receipt. Save Central is transparent and accountable; please contact us for further details regarding our structure and organisation.
2. Forward this letter to your friends, family and acquaintances. We need all those who care about New Zealand’s special landscapes, to join the fight to protect them. Our website provides the information needed to understand what we are about and what we aim to do. So, learn more about Save Central and make your donation by visiting www.savecentral.org.

Help us protect the New Zealand you love. We need your help, and now is the time.

I've done my bit. Now it’s your turn. You can also contribute by buying via the website an autographed copy of Grahame’s print Hawkdun Spring (that’s it above), a snip at $159.95. All proceeds go to the campaign.

Carly Simon in the Daily Telegraph:

‘My favourite flowers are peonies,’ Simon says. ‘From birth I have always known I was refulgent. Refulgent as the first tree peony on a dewy morning in the middle of May.’

Do any NZBC readers of “a certain age” remember this Heath Robinson contraption from the 1970s? It was called the Gizmo, marketed as the Gizmotron, and it was invented by Kevin Godley and Lol Creme of 10cc — pop video pioneers, falsetto-baritone double-act and legendary producers. Sadly, their device turned out to be temperamental once out of prototype and into production. Tiny wheels vibrated the string when you pressed a button, creating sounds reminiscent of a bowed instrument rather than a picked one. The bass guitar version (shown) was actively marketed and was considerably more successful than its six-string counterpart. (I recall someone telling me that Jaco Pastorius had tested one, but that seems implausible since Jaco could pedal notes so fast he wouldn’t have needed one.) My memories of the Gizmo stem from seeing Godley and Creme demonstrating it to a perplexed Michael Barratt or Stuart Hall on the BBC’s Look North or Nationwide (1970s UK equivalent of Close-up or Campbell Live). These days we have digital sampling, MIDI controllers and Garageband, but try telling the old people of today that and they won’t believe you.

An NZBC Consumer Report

If, by habit or preference, you do your fruit and veggie shopping at your local supermarket, you may want to reconsider - and cut your bill by a third.

The NZBC has gazumped the Herald, which recently showed you could save 16% on your grocery bill by "shopping around". Sadly, the hidebound Herald didn't shop around very far, sticking with the main grocery chains.

Thinking outside the square as always, NZBC has completed a scientific comparison between Foodtown and ... Silver Bell (that's the Chinese supermarket at the city end of Dominion Rd).

The result? For fruit and vegetables you can save one third of your costs by shopping the Chinese way. NZBC bought tomatoes at $4.99 a kg, compared with $7.98 at Foodtown, for instance - and Silver Bell had some larger tomatoes at an amazing $2.99 per kg. Green capsicums were nearly half the price while carrots and red onions were less than half.

Overall, buying 1kg of a range of fruit and veggies at Silver Bell cost $33.42. Foodtown, just down the road, came in at $51.33. That's an old fashioned whupping.

Other grocery items did not compare as well, when comparisons were possible. A lot of the stock at Silver Bell is, err, exotic, if not plain mystifying. Olive oil was more expensive and you won't find a lot of stuff such as good coffee, or cleanskins.

However, if you suspect the supermarkets are enjoying these high prices just as bit too much, why not split your shopping, save some bucks, have some fun and support local business all in one go?

This is great news. Bill Phillips was a New Zealand-born genius. He devised not only the Moniac, an amazing water-based analogue computer but also, as all economics students will know, the mega-influential Phillips curve.

Fun fact 1: a very famous New Zealander – you’ve heard of him; he’s often on the front page of the newspaper and seen on the TV news; he’s in these links – has written a novel about Phillips and how he invented his machine. It hasn’t been published yet, but it should be. I’ve read it and it’s really, really good. It’s the only novel I know of that makes both economics and economists exciting. Not sexy, that’s too big an ask, but definitely exciting.

Fun fact 2: one of the few Moniacs ever built was part of New Zealand’s exhibit at the Venice Biennale in 2003 – all the more reason why there should be one on permanent display at Te Papa.

Phillips is further honoured here.

For two weeks I’ve been testing the MacBook Air. I’m looking for the electronic equivalent of a pencil and notepad: a robust computer with a full-size keyboard that’s portable enough for days when all I want is word processing and internet access—the kind of tool that means I can work on my novel without lugging around the sumo wrestler that is my Toshiba P20 laptop. The MacBook Air has a lot going for it. I tested the 1.8GHz model with 2GB of memory and a 64GB solid-state drive. Like all Apple products, even the packaging is worthy of a Japanese wedding gift, and the Air feels built to last (although, of course, Apple has been taking flak lately, with consumer groups complaining about design flaws in many products—a disadvantage of outsourcing your manufacturing). Pros: The backlit keyboard’s ambient light sensor adjusts automatically, making the Air perfect for use on a long flight. Battery life is excellent; I worked on it for four- and five-hour stretches and the charge never dropped much below 50%. The keyboard is responsive and solid and, although the Air is extraordinarily light (1.36kg), this notebook can stand some knocks. With the entire case acting as a heat-sink, Apple seems to have cooling sorted; a major bugbear on the Tosh. Although there’s no DVD drive, link wirelessly to the drive of your Mac or Windows PC and you can synch files and install software. Cons: The all-metal case and trackpad remain cold to the touch, so starting work on cold winter mornings is disagreeable. The single USB slot is undercover in the base and the hinge doesn’t open wide enough to plug in many designs of key drive. The keyboard lacks Home, PgUp, PgDn and End keys, so if you’re familiar with PCs and can’t be bothered learning a bunch of new shortcuts, navigating around documents will be slow. Apparently even a solid state hard drive can only take a limited number of read-write cycles before it expires. And, oh yeah, I don’t have NZ$5139.

I've just done my weekly shopping and, yes, everything is more expensive. A half a kilo of tasty cheddar for $10? Unbelievable really. Rice is up, flour is up, my Dad even balked at the price of potatoes.

But there is one way to keep your grocery bill down ... cleanskins! $7.99 at Foodtown for a perfectly serviceable Hawke's Bay Chardonnay? Stick your cheese.

I also got a tyre changed while I was out. According to the guy in the tyre bay: China is collapsing but nobody wants to talk about it ahead of the Olympics; Labour will be a minor party after the election; Michael Cullen should have just let Toll's NZ railway business go broke and bought the assets for a song - like any good capitalist; the country's in deep shit; and much more.